Hearts & Sunsets

As I write this it's the golden hour that comes before sunset, and I love it because it's as if time stops for a bit. The golden light is like a reminder to take a breath, to relax, to take a moment to watch the swaying tree branches.

There's a weird kind of peace that comes with completing something. Finishing an essay or getting through an errand. That's why I like to keep periodic lists, perhaps even if I know I'll remember the items without one, because that concrete ticking off of list items just feels good.

And in a moment of serendipity I'm also listening to the song "I Know" by Aly & AJ, which has the relaxed lyric, "Who's really gonna care about tomorrow? It's gonna be fine" so pleasantly, hazily unfurled.

There's a lightness as well to this relaxed evening feeling that is so heightened by having accomplished something small. It's so nice to have done anything in the day, like scribbling for fun or cleaning up the kitchen a bit. We should all take time to sit with that feeling. It's the best.

My Paint Palette & The Universe

I thought I'd document my paint palette as it changes for a while, because it's so interesting and mesmerising how the paint blobs overlap and grow like an ever-expanding universe. So pretty but so inconsequential. I love it a lot.

Look at the colours and shapes flow and fold into each other. It's kinda comforting in a way. It's how everything works. Messy and shifting, forever.

Also I couldn't resist painting a cat on that last one. I messed with the natural progression of the palette, yes, but it was worth it.

Bunny Parade ft. Flower Dog

Apparently painting really is my passion, because I did these whilst I was not feeling very well and it did an incredible amount of good somehow. So I'm enjoying all their rough edges as symbolic.

I decided just to use black because thinking about colours would possibly have overheated my brain this time. I love the wobbly dog above. Possibly my favourite thing. It's so wobbly. A wiggly jelly dog.

It's mostly a parade of bunnies, however, so please accept them into your heart. They'll be safe there, and it's perfectly medically above board. I promise.

I really like this watery one with no legs. You don't always need to paint legs. There are no rules.

It's all very top notch here.


More hearts, bunnies, and bright colours? From me? Shocking. Yes, here they are. I went for a very exciting blue, green, and orange colour palette which feels a bit summery. I think the blue is my favourite, just to rudely judge and rank the colours there. I'm a cruel and heartless person that way. I'm sorry.

Anyway, there isn't too much to say about these, and there doesn't need to be. They're just here. Like me. There's no reason to anything, so just enjoy that. Look out of your window. Look at some trees waving around. Nice.

Antici... pation

People spend their lives looking for happiness, generally. That's the goal. Be happy. But what's interesting to me is how that can mean so many things. There's an ambiguity to happiness in that as a concept it entails so many variables. So many different kinds of happiness are out there. Our hormones are like a fruit bowl of options when you think about it. So I guess it's easy to chase a slightly not-actually-maybe-all-that-great version of happiness.

I mean, what are we talking about? Ecstasy? Extreme bliss? The muted yet deep relaxation that can come from sinking into a warmth bath? Ever-present contentedness that makes you feel like a happy little steam train chugging along? Miscellaneous fuzzy feelings that shoot around your chest like tiny fireworks? There's a lot to think about.

But one of my big favourite potential happinesses comes in the form of anticipation, perhaps morphing into excitement. That's something I've been feeling fuzzing around inside me recently for a few different things, and I was thinking about it, and actually I'd really like to feel more of that. If I'm chasing anything it should be anticipation. Like chasing the act of chasing itself. Hell yeah.

I want to do things that feel fresh and new. I want to grow and change. Sometimes I want to fly to New Zealand, change my name to Apple, and become a freelance botanist who plays the cello and only wears sundresses. Okay, that's an exaggeration, but the point is that I have dreams. The real ones are secret and stupid, but they're like jewels you keep hidden up in the attic. It's time to get that down and feel that glitter of sparkling anticipation, for my entire life.

Bunny Clouds

Here are some purple bunny clouds. Of course, this is their natural habitat, so please be respectful. I've been really into drawing in white on a dark colour lately. It feels right. It feels good.

There's something very satisfying about a deep purple too. It's such a great colour that looks so rich in its darkest tones. I'm a big fan. These bunnies are surrounded by stars for no particular reason. The stars are just drawn to them, really.

Also, here are some mysterious orbs:

Please enjoy the orbs.

Animal Crossing Journal #34: Contemplating The Weeds

I like the stages you can go through with Animal Crossing games. I may go months between visits a lot of the time these days, but it still has this lovely feel of visiting a hometown. Sure, things have gotten a bit messy, there's mismatched flowers in random spots and there's a new house in an inconvenient location, but the shifts that go on in the town when I'm not there are kinda great. It makes everything feel like a real place I can always go back to. It's such a unique feeling.

I wandered around for a bit, mostly cleaning up weeds and stray flowers, but one of my villagers suggested a new Public Works Project, which was a surprise to me because I thought all possible PWPs had already been suggested. There is always some little thing hiding in this game. It's just as nice coming back to it and weeding around town than it was to build everything up in the first place.

There are still a lot of cats here, too, but I discovered that Benjamin will soon be moving to town. He's a lazy dog, and I welcome him.

It's been a nice, small visit back to Boy, but I should probably remember to greet Benjamin soon (and I would like to reach maximum bell allowance at some point, so I gotta save up). For now though, I'm just going to do some weeding and sell some lemons.