Nature Nostalgia

me at an icy river with my cousins

You wanna know what I think about almost all the time? Trees and rivers and stuff, and fresh, crisp air, and lying down on a lot of leaves and then finding leaves in my hair 3 days later. Me and my family always did lots of stuff together in the outdoors when I was growing up (and we still do, when I see them). I remember one time around Christmas when thick snow fell. I was really small, and me and my cousins went tobogganing and I remember tobogganing right over a wall. Unless I dreamt that. It's hard to say. It's a thrilling memory even if it isn't a real one.

me with all my duck friends and my cousin Taryn

Actually it's kinda comforting to me that I don't remember things and have false memories and have memories I can't tell the legitimacy of. I feel less defined by my past when I don't know if my memories are real. Same with all the memories I know are definitely real, but are really hazy. Memories all worn out and old with lost details of how old I was or where I was, etc. But regardless of the specifics of a sequence of diminishing recollection, I miss the senses of the outdoors.

me at Kinghorn beach, reading a Treasure Planet comic (I was such a big fan of that film)

There are some nice foresty parts of London, but my experience in much more rural areas outside the city has given me the great longing to be out in the fields and trees and hills. My grandma had a caravan for a while at Kinghorn, on the east coast of Scotland (on an absolute tangent, I always associate the fire cavern from Final Fantasy VIII with the word/direction 'east'). I loved going there and hanging out around the beach as if I lived there. I think living near the coast like that would be really nice.

We also used to go all the way up the highlands to the beach at Arisaig (I made a post here about my last visit in 2014) and go on all sorts of walks and expeditions around woods and rivers and things. What I always hated were the long drives to get to all these places. I'm saving up for a horse and cart instead.