Ugly Me / Good Love

I watched a documentary called 'Ugly Me: My Life with Body Dysmorphia' recently and it was such an interesting and compassionate and oddly sweet thing to watch. I'm so interested in the way we all focus on things and exist inside an environment of our own feelings and perceptions of everything. Because I find myself almost constantly waking up from a particular phase or focus or feeling, like I'm coming out of a lake repeatedly. It's such a weird feeling, of sort of breaking consciousness. Like those days you wake up and throw cold water in your face to give yourself that sudden, unmatched, ready clarity that otherwise drifts off cloud-like to dissipate in the atmosphere. For a moment you're so clear and alive.

This is a picture of me listening to pop music.

Another thing that has totally gripped me is Aly & AJ's new release, 'Good Love' which to me feels like such a perfect illustration of the kind of great desire and fleeting, racing bliss that can come from that kind of shift in focus and clarity - and that vocal phasing around the 3:10 mark, oh man, it's the perfect audio representation of this feeling too.

This is me (in dog form, don't question this) dancing to pop music.

I'm waking up over and over again, all the time, and there's no point trying to clutch at forever receding straws, but I'm excited to keep waking up, and keep splashing that cold water in my face, and keep drifting off again into that phased out synth cloud. You know what I mean? Someone knows what I mean.

I love all the petals and leaves wilting and curling in the streets, I love all the lines and strange discrepancies in people's faces, and I sure as hell love the twinkling rhythmic synths Aly & AJ are blessing me with for summer 2018. They are the footmen of my heart.